Son, Don't Be Concerned About the Opinions of Others

Dear Son,
    Last week you said something that broke my heart. We were talking about what storybook character you wanted to dress up as for Read Across America day. Since we only had 2 days, I was making suggestions of characters that I could easily put together the costume from stuff we had at the house. I know how much you love the book Sir Ryan's Quest, so I made the suggestion that you could dress up as Sir Ryan.

 

      You looked at the picture and said the words that broke my heart, "I don't want to dress like him, I will look silly." I couldn't believe it. My imaginative, funny, sweet 5 year old was worried about looking silly at school. I was so sad that you already are worrying about what others will think of you. You allowed the opinions of others to dictate your choices. That breaks my heart.

      Sweet son, you are still at the age when "looking silly" is to be expected. You are at the age when you should be playing dress up and imagining all sorts of fantastic adventures. You are at the age when the opinions of others should not even register, you should just be doing what makes you happy.

      As your dad and I talked about you comments later, we both talked about how we hate that you are already concerned about your image. We don't want you to define yourself by what others think of you, we want you to define yourself by Christ. We don't want fear of man to stop you from doing something awesome.

      Most of all, I don't want you to grow up to be like me. When I was in middle and high school, I was so worried about what others thought of me, that I completely lost who I was. I became someone I didn't like and I stopped being me. I never want you to lose sight of who you are, my darling boy. 

      You are full of imagination and you have the best laugh. You are able to bring a smile to my face on my worst days. You are so compassionate and your teacher says you are the first person to be friends with the new kid in your class. You are not afraid to talk to anyone about anything. You are so intelligent and articulate, that people are often surprised you are only 5. And yes, babe, you are silly, and I love that about you. Embrace all that you are and don't let anyone take that from you.

       Yes, there may be times when someone who does not possess your imagination may laugh at you, and yes, it will more than likely hurt. But when that happens, I want you to remember why you did what you did in the first place, and I bet it won't matter quite as much. When people laugh at you or say mean things, I want you to remember that those people are usually afraid of what's different and are probably sad that they didn't have the courage you do. It takes great courage to be bold and different, so stay strong.

      Be silly, son. Be crazy and imaginative. Be who you are and don't let the opinions of others define you. Remember that you belong to Christ and that God made your personality especially for you. As long as you living to His glory, nothing else will matter. Sometimes the silly things bring the glimmer of joy that someone else desperately needs. Sometimes, YOU are exactly the person someone else needs.

     I love you and all you are, my sweet silly boy.